Halloween: DWTS Week 6

Halloween, the show we’ve been waiting for. And it was a complete dud for me. It was more tricks than treats. The only saving grace is that the next to worst dancer was sent home.

I found four highlights for the night. That’s such a dismal score than past seasons. Halloween has always been over the top fun, thrills, chills, and exciting routines. Think Frankie Munoz as a slasher and Jordan Fisher as a werewolf. Where was the magic? Nowhere to be found.

The highest of highlights was Amanda and Alan. We had to wait until the final routine, but it was worth it. My first reaction was simply WOW. When she asked Alan if he wanted to dance, I felt chills run across my body. It was so eerie. Loved the use of the song Paint It Black. Just made it that much more menacing. Her lack of expression throughout was especially chilling. Gave me goosebumps repeatedly. I have no idea what the hell Len means when he said it was “too sharp”. Sharp was what this dance was all about. The only thing that could have made it better was if she’d pulled out a saw at the end.

Olivia and Val rarely disappoint. Or rather, Val rarely disappoints. Olivia is just along for the ride, but what a ride. Their paso was what I felt like I was waiting all night for. It was good old fashioned, damn good dancing. She worked that skirt like nobody’s business. I felt a sense of control in her that while Val was leading, she was the one in command of the floor. He was required to dance to her tune. And I loved the music. I have no idea what the movie was about. I also don’t know what the judges said because the show was interrupted for a weather alert. Crap.

Suni is finally dancing like she means it, but just can’t seem to catch a break. She and Sasha brought out a proper tango, done the way it should be, with plenty of style and drama. She already has the tango face anyway. I just loved the flow of it. And all the judges can say is “ho hum”? They were robbed.

Gotta put the Miz in as a favorite dancer. He comes through every week. I just like him. That paso was made for him. He kept the intensity strong, but in check, and stayed in character. The movement flowed and he had no funny foot work. He knew his steps. I like the Chris Isaacs version of the song better, but they have to make do with the house band. Not a big fan of Pinhead, but I love the Miz.

After those four, the night was a series of “what the hell?” and a WTF?

Biggest WTF of the season was 40 for Iman. What? NO! It was episodic and lacked flow. Both last week and this week it’s obvious they are judging Daniella’s choreography and dance ability rather than his. The highlights of their dance was all her. He was just a lumbering scaffold for her to work on. I did like the airplane move. That was well done. Again, I had no idea what the movie was about.

Halfway between WTF and WTH was JoJo and Jenna. I found it a total misfire. I thought they were supposed to go for scary. I read IT and it scared the bejesus out of me. This routine looked like a kid capering about with a clown at the circus. I’ve been kind of scared of clowns since Killer Klowns from Outer Space, and IT solidified it. This clown piece wasn’t scary. The music was absolutely ridiculous. I guess the moves were okay if you like jazz, but it had no mood, no menace, no fear. A total dud. The judges are idiots.

Another WTH was Jimmie. Now everybody knows I love Jimmie. I think he’s one of the best male dancers left. Since the theme of the piece was silence, I was amused that the name of the song they used was Say Something (I’m Getting Over You). I love the song and it has a lot of stars on my iPod. But the contemporary they did was dry and emotionless. It was a big blah that didn’t reach me. Maybe if I had seen the movie. I think the extra points came from the tears. Carrie Ann will cry at the drop of a hat, and she always adds points for that.

This was the week I was hoping Cody would strut his stuff. Well, he did. In a way. But it looked so awkward. I missed the package and part of the dance because of another weather alert. I guess the local affiliate couldn’t pause the show because of the voting thing, but it was a mess. Not Cody’s dancing, but the weather alert. The judges fell all over themselves to congratulate him, but I wasn’t a fan. I saw American Psycho; the dance really didn’t evoke the movie at all. And I hated the way Cody’s belly stuck out like an old man on his cross overs. Still, you can tell Cheryl has been working on him. If he can hang in another week, he might make something of himself.

Melora’s jive just showed her age. There was no energy to it. She even looked tired as the dance began, and then went downhill from there. No kicks and flicks. WTH? And I read Cujo. Once again, no evocation of the story.

While it was time for Kenya to go, Iman should have preceded her off the show. Her Argentine tango was nice, and props to Brandon for getting her off the ground. She doesn’t look light weight. She just seemed to be on her tippy toes the entire dance. Len said “It captured the flavor of Argentine tango” but he often says stupid stuff when he’s off his meds. The fact that it DIDN’T capture the flavor the Argentine tango is what bothered me most. But nice leg extension.

I don’t know what to make of placement if the judges are going to be as irrational as the voting audience. Iman needs to go. He’s a nice guy, but not a dancer. Cody, the Miz, Melora, and Jimmie are on a par and should go next. I don’t think Suni has the legs to finish and will come in fourth. JoJo is the runaway winner. Amanda and Olivia can duke it out for second place. Or rather Alan and Val can duke it out. Val is the better dancer and choreographer, but Alan has shown he can pull it out his ass at the last minute.

As for the floor show, I found Derek’s routine less than a showstopper. Poor camera angles and too many extra dancers just got in the way. I could never get into the music, so the piece just didn’t work for me.

Next week is Queen. I hope it’s as much fun as Grease. Scaramouch, scaramouch, will you do the Fandango?

Now go read my story “Welcome to Hell” at talltaletv.com. Just in time for Halloween.